


I just wanna keep calling your name (until you come back home)

by CallmeVee



Series: Bechloe Week 2018 [4]
Category: Pitch Perfect (Movies)
Genre: Angst, Bechloe Week 2k18, Day 4, F/F, Why?, i'm proud of myself
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-26
Updated: 2018-07-26
Packaged: 2019-06-16 17:24:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,847
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15442101
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CallmeVee/pseuds/CallmeVee
Summary: Why?That single word contains uncountable answer; that much is true. From the most insignificant to the most painful reason someone could think about. But what happens when that word is a current fixture in her life? What happens when all her ‘why’s have no answers at all? Should she continue her life and move on as her friends tell her every day or should she search for answers? Answers that she might never find; that was always a possibility.Or, an angsty fic for Bechloe Week day 4.





	I just wanna keep calling your name (until you come back home)

**Author's Note:**

> Bechloe week day 4 is done! I'm so proud of this, man. I hope you all like this and please, validate me so I know if I did it right.

Another night that Chloe succumbed to the past and left a hot girl with unfinished business behind. She hated to be the asshole in the story. God knows she did. But what was left when her heart couldn’t find the peace it needed and thus, she couldn’t help but compare Beca’s body to every single girl she hooked up with? 

After 4 years together, Chloe knew the brunette’s body better than she knew her own. She knew every way in which Beca would lose her mind - in and off sex matters - and every single way in which she could turn her into a mess _just like that_. Man, she even knew every single little thing about the brunette. _‘Old habits die hard’_ was her motto for those awful nights.

Once she thought all the foreign caresses were washed off her body, she stepped out of the shower and stared at her reflection in the mirror. She pointed out every single faction that has changed since that day. Her eyes weren’t shining anymore and dark circles could be easily spotted around her _sad_ baby blues. Closing her eyes, she evoked Beca’s memories; and when she opened them again, there she was. Soft smile tugging at her lips and her warm arms around her waist. Allowing herself to rest her head in the crock of Beca’s neck, Chloe held into this moment for as long as she could. Her back fully pressed against Beca’s front and their heartbeats matching in pace. Baby blues connected with stormy blues and they started a gaze-contest. No words were needed when she had her like this. Not a single sound was heard during these rituals in which she got to see her again. Nothing could ever compare with her body being wrapped in Beca’s arms.

“I miss you,” she spoke softly, afraid to break the enchantment. Tears were already running freely down her face and little did she do to brush them away. She just stood there, frozen in place and time scared of just a simple movement disturbing the brunette.

“I love you endlessly,” Chloe’s breath stopped. It was the first time Beca answered to her quiet words. Usually, the brunette would just smile and kiss her temple. Maybe a soft ‘hmm’ could be heard. But never a word.

And since every good thing comes to an end, she was left alone _again_ at the knocks on the door.

“You okay there, Chlo?” Aubrey asked.

“Y-yes. Be out in a minute,” Chloe managed to swallow the lump in her throat to answer back.

She didn’t know how much she could handle living like this. This wasn’t life. No one deserved to live haunted by their past. No matter how much they deserved it. But for now, she had to _hold on_ and keep on going.

 _"It’s just to hold on,”_ she repeated herself stepping into Beca’s plaid. That same plaid that held so many tears in it.

Grabbing the old photography, she held it close to her chest and waited for Beca’s memories to lull her to sleep. Dreams were the only way in which she could interact with the brunette and so she repeated the same ritual every single night.

Meanwhile a few hundred kilometers away, a moody Beca struggled to finish her current task. Her brain seemed to be on strike since she’s been messing around with her equipment for a while and nothing could be used on this project. 

“Come on, Beca. You’re much better than this,” she mumbled to herself. Her mind couldn’t be able to think straight. All her thoughts led to _her_. Damn past, damn Chloe and damn herself for being unable to move on.

Since she locked eyes with the redhead 7 years ago, she knew they'd be something else. Maybe it was her eyes that shined like the bright blue sky. Or maybe was her smile, which could enlighten the darkest forest… Whatever it was, Chloe worked her path through Beca's barriers. Somehow, someway, the redhead managed to slowly and meticulously break her walls brick by brick.

One moment she was standing in the activities fair listening to her ramble about acapella and the next she was already screwed. When she realized she should pay attention, she was already head over heels for the bubbly girl and little did she do to fight it.

And boy, how didn't she regret it. Chloe made her the happiest girl alive during those 4 years they were together. Their long talks and their comfortable silences, made her feel at home. Chloe was her home.

All their memories together held so much meaning that it was hard to run away from them. Not for lack of trying, but the realization that it was Chloe or no one was so ingrained in her mind that it was impossible to move on.

Searching through her things, she found hers and Chloe's picture. Their matching smiles were the strength she needed to wait for her. Because she knew she'd come back one day. After all, when something is meant to be, it'll be. Right?

And like if she had evoked it, a vivid memory came to her. She could remember it as if it was yesterday.

_The night was calm. The couple was surrounded by trees and both pairs of eyes were looking at the sky. The stars shining brightly only fuelled their need to stay outside the tent even if it was chilly outside._

_"I want our house to be outside the city," Chloe said thoughtfully, her fingers entwined with Beca's. "I want to be able to look at the stars every night."_

_"I get you on that," Beca kissed the redhead's temple. "I'd give anything for this to be our daily night routine. Just imagine... A good meal followed by lying on the grass looking at the sky whilst cuddling."_

_"And I thought you were a tough badass alt-girl," Chloe joked._

_"Oh come on. I can be cheesy with the love of my life without anyone finding about it."_

Beca's heart skipped a beat at the memory. Her hands traveled through her hair as she stared at the picture of their getaway to Chloe's family's farm. The lovers deciding to camp in the woods near the house instead.

And just like that, inspiration hit her like a thunder in the calmest night. Gravitating towards her home studio, she started playing with the equipment already settled on the desk. A big smile on her face as her hands moved expertly doing its magic. And after three hours of work, she decided to finally call it a night.

It wasn't till next Saturday that Stacie drove her home after a night out with the gang, claiming that she should stop being a workaholic for a while and actually enjoy the life that she got to verbalize her feelings for the first time.

"Come on, Mitchell! You have to let her go," Stacie said breaking the silence.

"Why?" Beca asked looking through the window. "I'm comfortable with no other than Chloe in my life."

"It's lonely. It's been already 2 years. Don't you think that she'd have contacted you by now if she wanted you back in her life?" her best friend was getting deep in her head.

"Year and a half," Beca stated earning a glare from her friend. "I don't know, Stace," her voice shaking. The thought of Chloe being over her, made her heart ache like a bitch. The redhead was everything she needed and/or wanted. Her soul broke a little more every time she thought about a life without her.

"I truly think that time is all she needs. Don't ask how, but I feel that she'd come around sooner or later," she finalized as Stacie parked the car outside Beca's house.

“Who’s that?” Stacie asked towards the hooded person sat on the front porch. “What me to join you?”

“Neh, I have pepper spray. I guess I should know them?” Beca frowned. “I’ll text you later,” she kissed Stacie’s cheek and stepped out of the car. Little did she know that Stacie wouldn’t get the text tonight.

***

_"Come on. You're missing something," Beca grabbed Chloe's hand and led her to one of the booth games._

_"Ouuu, this is interesting," Chloe chimed before kissing Beca’s cheek._

_"I know. I owe you for last week."_

_"You know you owe me nothing. It was my treat, babe.”_

_“I know. I still want to give you something. Plus, if it works, you’ll be all turned on with my skills,” Beca winked before handing the money to the owner._

_“For all gods, Beca. You’re so full of yourself,” rolling her eyes, Chloe stepped back to allow her girlfriend space to play._

_The arouse she felt building up between her legs almost melt away when Beca asked for the stuffed Unicorn._

_“Here,” she said “As soon as I saw it, knew I should get it. It reminds me of you,” Beca’s smile grew up 10 sizes at Chloe’s reaction._

_“Oh my god, Becs. I can’t be mad at you for comparing me to a unicorn. Look at him!” the redhead hugged the animal as if her life depended on it._

_“I know. I do have game,” Beca accepted her kiss. “But seriously now. I want this thing to always remind you that my love for you is eternal, even if you can't see it. I want you to hug this unicorn every time I can’t be with you because, no matter what, you’re the one thing that I love and your place is on my arm. Do you promise?”_

And how could she break her promise if this exact unicorn was one of the few things she got left of Beca? Hiding her face on the stuffed animal, she tried to come up with a plan of action. If there was a minimal chance of having her back, she’d try it no matter the consequences. She was done mourning without doing anything.

“Where are you going?” Aubrey asked the next day as she came home early.

“I’m gonna get her back,” Chloe explained throwing a few things on her duffle bag. “You’re right, I can’t keep mourning.”

“Be careful, yeah?” Aubrey knew how much the result of this could affect Chloe. “Keep me updated and call me if you need me,” she hugged her best friend.

“Will do. Thank you,” Chloe kissed her cheek before making her way to her car.

The ride was filled with Beca’s presence once again. The adventures Chloe had with her girlfriend in that exact car, took place and Chloe allowed herself to hum in content as Beca smirked at her.

The hand resting on her leg as music played on the stereo was one of the things Chloe enjoyed the most. Caresses in her hair were what Beca enjoyed to do when boredom took place and the words weren’t needed. Comfortable silences between them were Chloe’s peace.

The moments between them were simple magic. The chemistry they had was something else. All her friends told them that they were jealous of such a perfect combination. And Chloe loved Beca. She loved her endlessly.

She knew that this had high probabilities of ending badly. But honestly, she didn’t care anymore. Not if she could get to see her again.

After hours of driving, the sign of Los Angeles came to view making Chloe smile. This was it. This was her moment. After all these months being a coward, she finally grew up some eggs and decided to be happy again. She just hoped it wasn't too late.

Getting out of the car, she braced herself to both, protect her from the cold night and reassure herself about what was about to happen.

Chloe stared at the house in front of her with her heart beating erratically at the simple thought of Beca being just a few feet apart. Taking deep breaths, she walked to the front door. Her hands sweating and her body trembling with anticipation. This was the time. For good or for bad, this was her last chance.

“But this is her address,” she mumbled to herself when no one answered. Maybe she was out? It was Saturday after all. After checking her text twice, she decided to sit on the porch and wait. “Hurry up, Becs.” And the name sounded foreign in her lips after so long time and she couldn’t avoid the little smile that appeared on her lips. Chloe snuggled even deeper in her jacket and threw the hood over her head. It wasn’t winter yet, but the cold was notorious in the night of LA.

It wasn’t long till she felt someone’s presence and the air left her lungs at the sight in front of her. Those stormy blues that she missed so much were staring back at her with something she couldn’t put her finger on.

And after so many, many nights apart, there they were. Both lovers face to face, just inches apart from one another. Chloe's heart was thumping fast against her chest.

Seconds passed like hours as she thought something, _anything_ , to say. The little Chloes in her head searching frantically for something to come up with.

 _"I've got my ticket for the long way 'round"_ Chloe sang the words. Her voice shaking slightly.

 _"Two bottles of whiskey for the way"_ Beca joined the redhead. Both of them mixing perfectly and they were automatically transported to the first time they mixed together 7 years ago.

 _"And I sure would like some sweet company. And I'm leaving tomorrow, what'd ya say"_ their eyes truly met for the first time in a while. Words weren't needed to show their feelings to one another.

Both of them knew the meaning of that song. It was the song that started everything. An untold promise that Beca kept after all these years if the smile on her face was proof about it.

"Hello," Chloe spoke after what seemed like an eternity. Her whole body trembling under the brunette's inspection. "I'm sorry that-"

Chloe felt wrapped in her lover's arms. The same arms that secured and protected her time ago. Tears started to fall as she let herself melt into the embrace as she held to Beca as if her life depended on it. Both women enjoying the moment in silence.

"Please tell me this is real," Beca spoke after some minutes. "Please tell me that you are here and that you came back to me."

Chloe choked at the words. Her legs started to tremble at the sight of Beca's face. Those stormy blues were filled with _hope_ and her voice was a whisper barely audible.

“I’m here if you want me to,” was all she could manage to say. Mixed emotions woke up the sleepy butterflies in her stomach.

Beca didn’t know how to wrap her head around all this.

Chloe was here, sitting right in front of her on the couch. After all these months she got her back and she was tempted to pinch herself to make sure that this was reality and not some of her daydreams. 

Yet, the same question that’s been popping up in 24/7 was still an enigma. Not a single day passed without Beca questioning the redhead’s decision. _“She promised herself to me,”_ she thought playing with the ring on her index finger.

“Becs,” Chloe attempted to hold her hand but backed up at the last minute. “I’m sorry.”

“ _Why?_ ” Beca knew that she couldn’t keep toying around. She never was a patient person. “Why did you give up?” pain still hanging in her voice. Not that she could help it; at the first problem they faced, Chloe decided to run away. For fuck’s sake, she was the one that ran from things, not the other way round.

“I… I had it bad,” bullshit. That answer wasn’t enough. Not after all the pain she had endured for the last 18 months.

Chloe paused trying to find the right words and Beca allowed herself to analyze her for the first time in the night. She wasn’t the same bubbly happy redhead she fell in love with; that much she could see. The usual twinkle in her eyes was missing and something shattered inside her. Beca questioned herself if Chloe was a misery too.

“Why, Chloe?” Beca didn’t know what compelled her to snap the words and she regretted instantly.

“I’m weak,” the redhead whispered. “I couldn’t keep up with not having you by my side.”

“So you decided to break up instead of telling me,” Beca laughed bittersweetly.

“I didn’t want to bother you. And with school in the middle it was impossible,” Chloe explained.

“You were my girlfriend, Chloe! We made a promise to each other,” Beca showed her ring to the redhead and tears found their way back to Chloe’s eyes.

“You kept it too,” it came weakly. “I thought-“

“Yeah, you thought. That’s the problem. You act based on what you think the situation is instead-“

“You’re no one to lecture me about this, Beca.” Chloe affirmed angrily.

“I am. You know why? Because I was the one left behind with questions that could drag me down if I let them. Because I was the one that had to suck it up and keep moving while all my body wanted to do was to lie in bed and never get out.”

Beca didn’t know when her own tears started to fall, but she could feel her body on fire and her hands shaking the angrier she got. One glance at Chloe showed her that she wasn’t much better either. She was crying silently playing with… with her _ring_.

“So let me ask you again,” this time, she breathed deeply before she spoke. “Why did you give up?”

“I was scared,” Chloe finally admitted. “You were busy all the time and I couldn’t seem to enjoy basing our communication in screens and phone calls. Not when all I wanted to do was hold you in my arms and listen to you ramble about your day.”

Chloe allowed herself to breathe before continuing. God knows she’s showing herself in a vulnerable state in front of the person that could either make her live forever or kill her with just a cut.

“I was so freaking scared that you would find someone else here and that you’ll choose them over me and I wanted to save myself the pain of the inevitable.”

“You really thought I could find interest in someone else?” Beca didn’t know if she should feel offended for Chloe not believing her words or if she should hold her and kiss her to drag some reason into that head of hers.

Opting for a third option, she squeezed Chloe’s hands. The softness of her skin made her hiss in anticipation.

“Chlo,” the words came so softly that Chloe chocked in surprise. How she had missed her name coming from Beca’s lips.

“I would never set eyes in someone else. I knew when I kissed you the first time that it was you. I knew right there that only you could have my heart. No matter how much others tried, my heart wa- _is_ yours,” her fingers itched to brush Chloe’s tears away and so she did. Her whole body shaking in a whole new vibration when Chloe leaned into the touch.

It was as if a new layer had settled between them. Uncertainty was hanging in the air and their hearts were wide open allowing each other access to do whatever they wanted with it. Love was palpable in the ambient, but also was the fear of being heartbroken again. Yet, none of them wanted to run. On the contrary, Chloe decided to give the first step and intertwined her fingers with Beca’s as if asking her for permission.

Chloe was tired of her old life. She needed Beca by her side in order to be a person again. She was tired of crying herself at night to sleep. And all she wanted now was to be in Beca’s life again, no matter how much she’d have to endure, she knew that she needed the brunette to live.

“Would you,” Chloe had to clear her throat. “Would you give us another chance?” she didn’t even want to know what would happen if Beca refused.

The silence was so fucking hard that each second seemed like hours and she could feel her heart beating erratically at the lack of an answer. She felt herself shrink under Beca’s stormy blues inspecting her. She forgot how scary it felt whenever the brunette just stared at her without talking at all.

“Would you always talk your fears to me?” Beca retorted.

Truth was, Beca couldn’t do this if she wasn't sure that Chloe meant it one-hundred percent no matter how much she died internally each moment that passed. She didn’t even care about keep asking questions. Not when the most important was answered already.

“Oh, my,” Chloe surprised her by wrapping her arms around her neck. And she couldn’t do much but to hold her closer against herself melting at the moment. Beca wished internally for it to never end.

“I’m so sorry for what I did,” Beca could feel Chloe’s whimper and her heart ached.

“Shh. I’ve got you,” she stroked Chloe’s hair softly trying to calm herself too in the process.

“Would you take me back?” Chloe whisper-asked when they parted away.

“You don’t know how much I’ve been waiting for that question,” Beca laughed softly and Chloe couldn’t help the little fire that ignited her insides.

“So… It’s a yes?” Chloe wanted to make sure that she wasn’t imagining things.

But instead of answering, Beca decided to go all-or-nothing and closed the distance between them. And oh sweet lord, was it magic.

Beca smiled when - after the moment of shock - Chloe started to kiss her back. How did she missed these soft lips on hers. Not a single day passed without her remembering them and now that she actually had them back she felt like touching the sky. All the emotions she felt once 4 years ago came back to her and she made sure to embrace them tightly.

Why now and not before was an answer she’ll request later, for now, she just wanted to hold Chloe in her arms and show her how much she loved her. After all these months, the universe was giving her a rematch. And Beca swore right then right there that she'll fight endlessly for her happy ending with the love of her life.

And Chloe? Chloe decided right then in that kiss that she’d finally give herself to Beca. She had experienced first-hand what a life without the brunette would be like and she knew she didn’t want to go back to that place. She deserved to be happy and Beca would always be her happy place. She realized right there that Beca was her home and she wanted to live in it forever.


End file.
